The title is pretty obvious, there is no real hidden message here. Too often , we only see the good on social media and online. Promotions, new jobs, moving to a new city, a new relationship, a vacation, seeing friends, accepted to college, a graduate program. You get the point, but the point of this article is to highlight the reality of life. Life sucks sometimes but life still goes on.
While I was fired from my coaching position last week, it was expected, yet unexcepted, for reasons I am not going to get into on here for the integrity of the organization and the people who may be reading this to only know why I was fired. Reach out and I would be more than happy to tell you.
Like I said the reality of life is that people get fired, things happen that are not planned, things in life happen that we are not ready for and throw a huge wrinkle in our life, our plans and our future. It certainly does suck that I was fired from my coaching job, it certainly changes what my plans our moving forward. It makes you have to start all over and go back to square one and find another coaching job. It could end in me having to move again, my third move in four years, it could mean I would have to start all over again, find new clients, make new connections, new friendships, coach a new team and do everything I did when I first moved to Iowa in July of 2019 over again. Does all that suck? One thousand percent. Do I want to do that again? Not really. Do I think I can? Without a doubt.
To me the real down part is the thoughts immediately following my firing. I second guessed coaching, I told myself I think I am done with this hockey coaching stuff and just finding 9-5. Or just not coaching and just doing training is the route I am going to go. I told myself this was not worth it. I told myself I wasted two years, thousands of dollars, ample time and effort with nothing to show. I still am totally unsure of what my next step is and where I will be in six months or so.
To many who have found themselves in my situation and or are in my situation you probably understand where I am coming from. Where trying seems useless, where continuing to keep going seems pointless, where it feels as if everything you have been doing is not worth it.
Therefore what keeps you going? For me it is the fact that while I may not think it there's people that actually look up to me and find motivation in my ability to never give up and never stop moving forward. For me it is the fact I know I have touched many young hockey players lives, I know the kids I come across learn something from me. While there is always a few kids who disliked me as a coach for whatever reason and there are always those few parents who make coaching hard. But for me it is the players that have expressed their gratitude to me, there thanks for what I have done for them, for me it is the parents who reach out and see what I have done for their kid and other kids on the team. That's what keeps me going, not the small majority of parents and players who dislike me, it is the large majority of parents and players who have enjoyed my time coaching their kids or the players themselves.
Like I said, I have no idea what is next for me. I have no idea where I will be. Does the uncertainty of not knowing what is next or where I will be next unsettling? Sure. Does it take away from me continuing to wake up and believe every day that what has happened to me is for the better and when one door closes another opens. That is the only way you will get through tough times. I have realized this first hand on multiple occasions over the last three years. Every single tough path, every single road block, every single time your back is against the wall and you feel as if you can't keep going. DON'T GIVE IN and just keep going, every day just keep going, tell yourself that this tough time was put into your life at this exact moment for a reason. That right now may be uncertain but eventually everything will fall into place.
It takes self-belief, a strong self-confidence and discipline to think like this. While everything seems to be going against exactly what you are telling yourself and you! Something I tell myself every day is that "this going to seem like nothing in a year, stay positive". Don't ask me how I keep going and continue to believe in myself every day and believe that good will come and something will come up and I will be fine. I really do not know what to do most days other than just believe, trust myself and stay positive.
The journey has not been easy, from my senior year of college to moving to Virginia to take on Graduate Assistant job, to having a 14UAA hockey team fall into my lap, to moving to Iowa to take over a high school hockey program to now being fired 1 year and 9 months into the job. But, the ending will be worth it, the story, the journey I'll be able to share with my kids, to young kids in my same position, to other people who may feel how I feel and or are lost in life. What is worth having in life is never easy, keep moving forward.
And to end it with a song I have played multiple times over the last week, a song that as corny as it may sound helps me keep going. "That's Life" by Frank Sinatra.